'If you don't know what you want," the doorman said, "you end up with a lot you don't.' ~ Chuck Palahniuk
My mom strategically sat next to me and his mom next to my mom so I had to act shy but one can pretend for so long. With my chin slightly down, I managed to look at him through my eyelashes. He was a little low on confidence which led to an instant urge to play a rapid fire round with him but I dropped the idea thinking that he may not survive. It was also a little unnerving to have so many eyes fixed at me. His family's demeanour convinced me that I was the only woman who agreed to give their son a chance and it appeared that they were wondering if I will be generous enough to give a verdict in his favour. I didn’t see that happening though.
Despite the subtle music in the background, his silence was deafening so I opted to lead. All his answers pushed me to laugh and give him a piece of my mind but I had to resist that as well. Such tormenting was the setting.
I had no interest in enquiring about his work profile. I had done my home work. So I began with the most basic and the easiest question:
How do you utilise your spare time?
I sleep.
(How creative!!) Throughout the weekend?
Mostly. Actually during week days, I wake up at 6am and sleep at 11pm. So I catch up on my sleep during weekends.
That was still more than what I sleep but I figured he had no other hobby/passion in his life.
Do you like travelling?
Who doesn’t?
You don’t ask question in response to a question but he seemed oblivious to that.
I know people who prefer to stay indoors. Anyhow, what kinda places you like to travel?
Anywhere.
You mean 'anywhere'. Even to the remote areas of the Southern Sahara Continent.
I didn’t mean that. I would like to go on a world tour. I like beaches.
Why bother the world to see a beach. Go to Goa or Kerala.
Honestly, he didn’t look like the types who love travelling and meet people to experience their culture.
Do you have interest in adventure sports or in general sports for that matter?
I am scared to take risk so adventure sports are definitely not for me. As for sports, I don’t religiously follow any. Just enough to keep conversations with friends and colleagues.
Not even soccer or cricket or tennis or grand prix.
Not really.
Even more interesting!
You don’t know what you're missing on then. I believe if you don’t take risk in life, you aren’t living your life really. But then again, to each his own.
Do you read?
That I do. I read newspapers to keep myself updated on the capital market.
OMG! You're so different.
You mentioned that you have no other hobby than to sleep. My bad!!
I read that much on my phone while travelling to work and I don't count it as 'reading'.
What do you love the most about yourself?
That I want to keep my life uncomplicated.
Wow! That was an intelligent one. You know, generally people like to screw their life. I am sure that’s what keeps them going. After all, you got to have some motivation to get past each day.
That reminds me, what motivates you?
Money.
(How clichéd!!)
Of course, what else can? My bad… again!
Is there anything you expect out of your life? Something you'd like to achieve.
Personally, I want to keep my life uncomplicated. Professionally, I'd like to continue with my current profile.
Again... so challenging!
Why do you want to get married?
For the same reason other people do… its time. My parents want me to settle down now.
By 'its time', you mean, age?
He responded to my question with “are you a dumb?” look.
I don’t understand the fixation about age when people decide to marry. Marriage is a lifetime commitment and you gotta be physically, emotionally, mentally ready to commit to someone. How can age be a deciding factor?
So will you marry anybody your parents choose for you or you have any expectations from your prospective partner?
She should be friendly.
I am really friendly once you learn to worship me.
I was really impressed by his unique point of view (or lack of it). His life was so simple. Any friendly girl would be fine with him. In fact, I reckon it didn’t even matter to him whether he marries a woman at all, any friendly man would be equally fine with him. All he needed was a partner who was as dead as he was. I guess he never gave it a thought that he was living like a zombie.
He didn’t ask me any question except where I did my schooling. To which I wanted to say that I didn’t go to school at all. In fact, I used to sit outside the window of a classroom.
He could have chucked my questions back at me, if nothing else. I guess he lacked curiosity completely. I found him totally directionless who didn’t know what he wanted from his life. He could travel to anywhere, he was ready to marry anybody, and he had no specific goal in his life.
Instead his father asked if I was rigid about working post marriage.
That was perplexing. That’s a decision a woman should take. Entering into a relationship doesn’t mean I will have to let a part of myself be taken away. Taking on the responsibility of a relationship doesn’t mean one has to give up on doing the things one likes to do. Anyone in a relationship should have the freedom they want. Why will anyone lose their identity to a relationship? One should be honoured as an individual human being and not just as a partner or the "other half" of a relationship.
His mom, who was until now looking at me adorably, asked my mom if I had any physical ailments.
My mom should have asked if their son was suffering from AIDS.
Being a woman, I should be more concerned about his health. I pitied their line of thinking. Guess we are developing in the material sense but not evolving really.
“Hope to see you soon!” He said before leaving.
“Hope as soon as never!” I replied.
I guess it’s about time when my parents should understand that touching their feet, earning a handsome package, possessing good looks and having own property doesn’t qualify a man to be 'my' prospective life partner. It’s more important that he loves 'life', cherishes my chirpiness, is able to hold a meaningful conversation and most importantly appreciates 'me' as a person and doesn’t want just anybody.
Phew!! It was an exhausting experience. Let me grab some rest.
