Kids, on your way to the right partner, you meet many wrong ones. But don’t be disappointed, meet all of them with equal ebullience, take your lessons, and don’t forget to enjoy.
Remember, its one life, relish every moment!!!
It’s a rainy Sunday morning, one that doesn't let you step out of your bed. I am doing just that... sleeping in my cozy warm bed when my stupid phone starts to ring. I open one eye to check the time… It’s 10. I wanna sleep some more. I put the phone on silent. It rings again, this time on vibration though. I’m agitated. I take the call nonetheless.
“Wake up baby,” Lily says.
Me: “And Do what? Talk to you!! I’ve better things to do.”
Lily: “Baby get up. I do have something to tell ya.”
Me: “Don’t bore me ya.”
Lily: “Does a Standford Grad interests you?”
Me: “You kiddin me?”
Lily: “No I am not.”
Me: “Why will I interest him?”
Lily: “Don’t underestimate yourself.”
Me: “Shut the fuck up.”
Lily: “Ok check you email.”
Five minutes later…
“It’s fake,” I say
“May be… And if he is then he doesn’t know who he is messing up with?” Lily says
Me: “None of my business, baby. Let go!!”
Lily: “If you don’t, someone else will. Take the lead. Besides, it may not be fake. You never know unless you try.”
Me: “Don’t give that to me. I remember these words very well. I am NOT interested.”
Lily: “Baby, I have already responded to him, you will get a call in a while.”
Me: “F@#% you. You’re not my friend. I severe my friendship with you. Break-up! Break-up! Break-up!”
Two hours later…
Dad: Some Aditya Chopra (Name changed) called for you.
Me: Who Aditya Chopra?
Dad: He gave reference to XYZ matrimonial site. He left this number.
Me: Damn!! Ok I remember. (I explain the situation to my dad.)
Dad: Let me talk to him.
He reveals that his parents are in Canada for a wedding. He has a sister who is pursuing MBA from NYU. He stays in the same city as mine and just bought a bungalow. He is working as a Director for some company.
Impressive so far, isn’t it? Read on…
At this point, I ask my father to let me speak with him.
Me: “What in my profile piqued your interest?”
He: “You’re simple and intelligent.”
Me: “How come my profile speaks of intelligence? And how you define simplicity?”
He can’t come up with a convincing answer. But I am looking for something substantial.
Me: “What are your future plans?”
He: “To get married.”
(Boy! he is desperate!!) GEE!!!
Me: “Besides that?”
He: “Haven’t given much thought to it.”
Me: “Darn! You can’t be from Stan!! You’re boring!”
He: “You don’t know who is Aditya Chopra.”
Me: “Yeah! I don’t know about you but Aditya Chopra is the director in Bollywood.”
He: “Go Google. You will find out.”
Me: “You don’t know who is Dudette. You’re messing up with the wrong girl dude. Back off.”
He: “Babe, You interest me. And I want to marry you.”
Me: “Hang on!! This is the first time we are talking. We haven’t met yet. And you wanna marry me? You insane? Can I have your address please?”
He: “I love you. You don’t trust me?”
Me: “WAIT!!!! Address please!!”
He: “Do you want to speak with my parents?”
Me: “I want my parents to meet you first. Then I will meet your parents. Address please.”
Line goes blank.
I receive an SMS which reads “I truly loved you and I believed that I found my soulmate but guess what you never trusted me. When I shared your profile with my parents, they were so glad that their Adi found the love of his life. You disappointed me.”
I wrote an email to my phone service provider and asked them for call details of the call that I made. Two days later, I get a response from them saying that the number belongs to some suburb in Bihar.
I forwarded the email as is to Aditya Chopra. Apparently, I never got a reply.
Best thing, his profile is no more there on the site :-)
